Abuse takes many forms: physical, emotional, verbal, cyberbullying, sexual, and even spiritual. In recognition of the damage that abuse causes, the government protects children physical and sexual abuse through Child Protection Services. In adulthood, assault and intimate partner violence are just some of the actions that are considered reportable crimes in most States. The pain of abandonment, rejection, or betrayal is experienced deeply. Unprocessed trauma results in physical and emotional damage as well as self-destructive behavior in later life such as excessive drinking and smoking.

People who have been abused and betrayed are usually hurt and angry. After having their spirits crushed (Proverbs 51:13), they often question their own value and worth, even to the point of thinking about or attempting to take their own lives. An example that illustrates this point would be of a twenty-two year old woman raped by her boyfriend even after she repeatedly told him no. Afterward, she felt shame, ashamed of herself, of how she was abusively invaded. She walked into her bathroom, crying, scrubbing all the grit and dirt away from her body. She knelt on the tiled floor and cried as she felt dirty and emotionally drained from what she had endured a few hours ago. After days of crying and grieving, she felt angry, mad at herself for not fighting harder, for not doing enough to make him stop invading her. Who knows how many other twenty-two-year-olds have shared the same experience? Who knew how many other people out there felt pain and anger, mixed with thoughts of revenge to at least try and ease their pain?

At these dark moments, how do we stand up again? How do we fight the pain? And how do we stay strong for ourselves and for our worried families and friends? Some people may be fighting silent battles of their own, but many helpful things can be done. We pray. When you are forced down on your knees to cry from the pain, force yourself to put your hands together to pray, pray for guidance and peace, pray for strength, pray for protection, and pray to God to experience God’s comfort in the midst of your suffering. Also, never forget that you can always turn to people for help. Those who surround you will be your source of comfort and strength. Accept the shoulder they are offering, lean on them, and share your story with them. You may find that you are not alone. Your biological family and your church family may also be a great source of support as well although, at times, they may not understand.

Please understand that Satan is trying to destroy you through the experience of abuse. Although the memories of the abuse might be like a tape replaying in your head, learn to fight the demons that are haunting you even when you aren’t sleeping. This may be easier said than done, but do not let it get to you. Seek help from safe people around you, and do not be ashamed of anything that has happened. People are there for you. God is there for you. He loves you no matter what!